It’s been a while since I did a proper update, so here goes.
Last week I went and did acupuncture. It was, to say the least— interesting. I was filled to the brim with anxiety that day, I tensed whenever I could feel her hands get close to my skin, almost like little muscle spasms. We didn’t do all the needles we could have because eventually my nerves were too much to deal with and we had to stop and leave in what we had for the twenty minutes instead. She would hold her hands on my feet, and the small of my back and neck, and back to my feet— talking about energy, stories, positive reinforcement. After the session, I felt.. Stoned. Really, seriously, it was weird. It only lasted about ten minutes, but it was strange. We moved from the acupuncture room to the physio room to do some quick kind of acupressure based exercises. I noticed when I lied down on the mat, that the incredibly deep curve in my spine was mysteriously just.. Gone. This maintained after the acupuncture, my anxiety overall has gone way down (I had terrible lingering anxiety beforehand), my swelling and sharp pains went away. I’ve overall felt like the acupuncture helped. Unfortunately, it’s 74 dollars a pop, but I do plan on making another appointment, maybe for a couple weeks from now.
While acupuncture did help some of the brain fog, it still doesn’t scratch the surface to how detoxing helps me. Unfortunately, I haven’t been able to do that given we have a burst water pipe. Now we have next to nothing for water pressure (even the toilet takes like an hour to refill, yay) and the water we do get is full of dirt. Definitely not something I want to be detoxing in, or washing anything with, or cooking with. So needless to say, my diet has tanked a bit in turn, which hasn’t helped either. On top of that, I was supposed to take out my NuvaRing three days ago and I’ve put it off, even though it’s been past four weeks, to try and ward off my period long enough for someone to come and fix the damn water pipe. It conveniently burst on a Friday afternoon, on the sidewalk meaning it’s the city’s problem, meaning it might not get dealt with until tomorrow at the earliest and it’s all ready been three going on four days.
So, my nights (and mornings) have been pretty bad. Not as terrible as they have been/could be, but bad nonetheless. Thankfully it’s been mostly just the nights and mornings, I’ve had breaks of clarity and alertness during the daytime and that’s nice. I am currently exhausted, only got about six hours of sleep last night, so I might go to bed pretty soon.
I’ve sent e-mails to two ND’s now asking if they’ll take me on as a patient. I’m hoping to start treatment sooner rather than later. I know that treatment will likely leave me herxing and sick at first, but I’m confident that things will get better. Hopefully better enough that I can tack on an upgrading course for physics along with my all ready registered Chemistry (plus lab), Developmental Psychology and Women’s Studies courses. I was wanting to do a five course load this year, but I don’t want to risk it with my health. If it takes another year, it takes another year— not a big deal. At least I keep telling myself that. Not sure if I believe it all of the time, but I need to continue the positive reinforcement.
Things will get better. They will get easier. I will recover and I will end up with 23948275023 dollars in student debt.